he had some odd quirks
but who didnt
they werent deficiencies or moral
gaps to steer wide of
not infectious
contagious or cancerous
actually
thinking of them then and back to then now they were pleasantries he longed for missed
unseen since
their meeting was obtuse(a simple
tick he possessed and never relinquished
he felt people might as well realise he was a bucket of cold water if they didnt want to be wakened or aroused
they would be mistaken to venture into his world or rather witness his
perception of things)
their hands
fixed a firm tight grip
Yah Dumber than what
he caught the inflection in his
voice Not dumber Dummer D-U-M-M-E-R
Thou dost protest too much methinks
Hamlet Lady or Queen Queen Gertrude
She was ironic
Infallibly so
they formed a fast friendship
Dumber liked Camel straights
but when he couldnt afford them
he fell back to Drum tobacco rolling papers and rolled his own
bartenders backed up braced by
bouncers said Not in here buddy Take your dope outside
going through the batwing doors he
fixed him with his aside See Dumber than what
Youll see
then more than a couple of astonishing times
in foetid Minneapolis or Saint Paul dives they fired up a joint between them its scent wandered lost amid the miasma of
stale cigarette smoke beer booze sweat all faintly tinged by the stink of urine
emanating from akimbo bathrooms or the graveled alleyways peeking in through the
open backdoors
the red lettered EXIT sign above them were bullshit
patrons they liked being
called patrons came and went
Dumber loved hockey
he was a huge fan
played it in his youth
he sported a wicked scar that ran
from his eye across his temple and disappeared into his closecropped blonde
hair from a crosscheck while he was up against the boards trying to force an Icing
he watched pro games on TV
its sound OFF
and listened instead to local
radio station announcers making the play-by-play calls
he preferred their hardlearned
pronouncements and on-the-air slapstick to the pretty suits the dunderheads on television
Yah Dunderheads another of his distinct affectations
Dumber loved fat women
it wasnt that he was unattractive albeit slightly walleyed
No he maintained they were a Whole Lotta
Love(a Zeppelin shout out) and were so very very damn grateful
Besides man its a dirty job but
somebodys got to do it
he said they made him breakfast the
next morning
he said he thought it was a reward
for not slipping out in the middle of the night
How
do you think I afford Camels when I do A
penny saved babe is a penny earned
Dumber was quick and keen with his
selfserving homilies you could almost
see his rat whiskers wiggle checking the hole if was big enough to escape
through and despite their friendship he
was quite sure he probably could be cajoled
to say conceited that someday somewhere Dumber
would serve him up one of his homilies hot to his disadvantage
you play with fire youre gonna
get burned but sticking around was far too
enticing
when in Season
lunch break
on the job
Dumber pulled noisily through his
brown paper sack lunch
he pulled out a sandwich wrapped
in waxpaper meatloaf
a dill pickle also wrapped in
waxpaper
alongside he had a cellophane sack
of potato chips sealed with electricians tape
halfway through lunch he belched they couldnt have lunch without a wet belch
then apparently finished folding his
sandwich waxpaper saving it for tomorrow he grabbed his sack slyly as if surprised as if he forgot something then catching his eye across the pallets of the
separately stacked lumber they sat on he winked at him
that puzzled him
then acting he was reaching deep
deep deeper into the worn slack papersack he pulled out a good-sized peach
he smiled as he bit it
it squirted
Dumber made a spectacular mess of
eating it juice sparkled in his
moustache matted his soul patch runlets descended the inside of his forearms and
dripped from his elbows
he bit he sucked then nearing its end only bits of flesh clinging to its stone Dumber
eyed him and winked again over the mess on his shirt and pants
he got it
Yah I
gotcha he said I still prefer my peaches
firm
Dumber played sax
he was quite good
he wasnt shy playing it for him new songs he taught himself hed have him over for a couple of beers then
play he liked his feedback they were both into jazz while most around
them seemed keen on the cooling embers of disco and rehashed rock n roll
with the reed in his mouth he
set up his chair music stand arranged sheet music clues to jump from yanked ON
the pullchain of the naked lightbulb overhead
he was ready
You
ready
Im ready
Lets go man Lets play some jazz
and
he shut the door shut himself up inside a closet off the livingroom and played
sometimes he played an hour straight
but an hour was it if he really pushed
it
he needed a cigarette
when Dumber invited him over to listen to
music he usually picked up a pack of Camels as his thank you the price of cigarettes a six-pak of beer
were cheap compared to tickets at a venue
you couldnt get more intimate
quirks aside Dumber was alright
he never played his homily chit
on him
Thank God he wasnt sure how hed
react
he died of an overdose on the
anniversary of his fiancées overdose just before they met
1123, Sunday,
20 3. 16
1417, Monday,
21 3. 16
