I confess I was 

somehow              
                            attracted  

honestly  more mystified 

                                        by his shadow  thrashing  at the brick walls in the alley

backlit by an obscure street lamp   yellow   and sickly 

he thrashed with his arms

his body moved frightfully    twisting

as if he were caught in deep churning waters struggling to keep his head up above it

 

swimming for his life

I didnt see any other shadows or hear voices running beside his  or trying to interrupt his blubbering    

looking around me   I didnt see anyone either
 

he began to calm

take possession

    I walked into the alley   as I approached I watched his shadow grow taller and darker 

I breeched an interior corner  avoiding the tortured garbage cans there and finally laid eyes on him  

disheveled  would be a mild take

that he had arms legs and a head made it fit that one could call him a human being

a human being hung out to dry

scarcely far enough away 

likely  for other peoples taste

the source of his discontent  perhaps  lay at his feet

a smashed bottle

some shards held by its label 

it was certainly responsible for the tongue he spoke in

in the edges and tines of its upturned glass  amber and honey marbled  twisting in the teepee of light formed between the shadow of his raggedy pantlegs 

he staggered backwards and the glass went black 

in the shroud by his body

 

he staggered again

fell hard on his ass

shaken deeply

then collapsed onto his back his voice tamed to mewling    

incoherent  

alone

I stepped out from the wall and trashed cans into the throat of the alley

he didnt see me

he didnt acknowledge me

he roused himself 

he sat up shaking his head  

his mop to vie with Medusas

upright  his shoulders twitched    telegraphing his exhaustion from his thrashing 

bright skeins of spittle of reflected light stretched between his mouth to his mottled shirt front

 

I walked towards him

he sat dumbfounded watching my approach

--   Are you okay  I asked

--   Whayawan      ta

--   Are you okay

--   Yam

--   Can I help

--   Nah

--   I cant help

--   Nah

--   If I could help  what could I do

--   Nutin

--   What were you doing

--   Duin

                   slingin      prophets

  

slingin prophets at da wall

seein ifn one

might stick

1338,  Saturday,  2  5. 15

 1357,  Sunday,  3  5. 15

I am an ant 

I am an island

 

Sing it boys! You know how

Just like I taught you 

I am an ant I am an island

Aw comon . . . on a freshly fallen shroud of snow . . . Okay . . . if I never loved I never would have cried . . . Getting there . . . I touch no one and no one touches me . . . Thats right . . . I am an ant

                                                                                                                      . . . I am an island

Lets close it out . . . and an ant feels no pain

Together now!

. . . and an island never cries

                                                      dumbdedum  dumbdedum    dumbdedum    dumbdedum   a rock  dumbdedum  dumbdedum a leaf   dry   too big for me to carry alone  tastetaste   tasteless   aint wasting another ants time    dumbdedum   dumb  dumbdedum      dumbdedum   ahwisteria blossom  drying    still humor    pollen     ach beeshit    grab a few  dumbdedum  dumbdedum      BUMP Watchit   oh  Hello     wisteria    behind meYes    follow my pheromone   cant miss them  big      as big as we  strewn far and wide   dumbdedum    dumdbedum  dumbdedum  stick dumbdedum  lichen oops slick  dumbde   hardpack earth dumbdedumb  dumbdedum  hardpacked   rain  no rain  rain  ha whats that dumbdedum  not that wed miss it   dumbdedum   snff  tobacco  snff  burnt   dumbde   filter  red lipstick  dumb     dumbdedum  dumbdedum  BUMP  Watc . . . oh Yes   behind me   follow my pheromone  Yes  following its   twin trails then cant go wrong        dumbie         dumbdedum  dumbdedum

I am an ant   

                    dumbdedum I am an island    dumbdedum  dumbdedum   and an ant feels no pain   dumb      dumbdedum  and an island never cries   dumbdedumb

                                                                    Really

he followed this lone musing ant  

                                                     which crossed the broken sidewalk in front of him  he saw it over the top of the book

he was reading as he walked

You do see things despite what people think

the book published posthumously(posthumorously) was by Kurt Vonnegut  it was published on the anniversary of his death   Armageddon   the ant herky jerky   broken field running   would have been a great runningback  without a navel to fix on  and its frantic flight was suddenly worth the investment of his time to see where it was going   if it was going anywhere  if someone followed him eventually he would end up somewhere  so  was it foraging  or was it heading home at the end of a long day that it might have thought was fruitless  just another date to X out with Magicmarker on the calendar hung beside the backdoor   some fucking tally sheet perhaps  Xd out counting the doldrums  dumbdedum

of ones life  their day after day after day to day

not that he did

calendars and clocks and timethings inhibited him

and who in their right mind wanted to be inhibited

so he walkedreading exhibiting himself

much like this bumbling though it may not be bumbling  he was casually assigning bumbling to it   after all  it could be a drunken stumble and wouldnt he be feeling bad if it were already noon somewhere in this ants world hours ago and it was well ahead on it way home and sillier than he

My apologises my eusocial insect friend  of the family Formicidae(which made him think of Formica and formidable)

of the order Hymenoptera(which no one wanted to know what that made him think of) which has been in existence

for more than one hundred million years

about time someone followed this little tike

he had quite the headstart

he followed it over the remainder of sidewalk  past an edge of a shrub  descend the face of a red painted curb onto a tarmac driveway that divvied up small business suites  ascended another curb  entered a browned out thatch of useless grass to a well maintained aggregate sidewalk that it crossed  then descended to the bare earth there  raked free of foliage debris  to the foot of shrub where loosened earth had been perfectly formed into a blunt cone  at its apex an opening he could have slipped the end of his little finger into if it werent for the mad activity of hundreds of other ants  milling(again  his assignment) and many foraging  a hundred  easily  who returned to their nest with organic debris clenched in their jaws  

his tike without pause disappeared down into the hole

unaware it had betrayed its entire colony        

                                                                    if he bore it or its colony any malice or ill will

by his guess

                     the trek  the interlope cost nearly a half hour  and fifty sixty feet of shoe leatherwear   dumbdedumb

Really

2014,  Friday,  1  5. 15