8.2.15



he was a man of the cloth  a cloth of his own making  a web woven by a bitter black spider 
who rode in on a nightmare at the head of a fury of razorcleated horses
                                                                                                                      I heard that of him
I could see that

I watched him standing atop a remote hill
rigid  and disturbed

he was etched by daylight breaking behind him  and turning grey in its vapours
                       
he had been looking
hed been looking for me since last night

                                                                                            I watched him from where I hid
precariously  
                    behind a heavy brush stickled with thorns
I watched him throughout the night
  
I could make out the occasional pindots that flashed off his irises like the light off the lens of a deliberate camera 
                              like lightning shocks off dirty puddles   as he swept the 360 degrees of the sallow landscape beneath him
                                                   an inveterate watchtower
seeming invulnerable   believing himself immune
                                                                                  he stood on high  poised to either sound
an alarm for defence or direct strikes by lesser adjuncts who feared him
which  for what I knew of him  was more likely
                                                                                                                            
from what I knew of him I would never turn my back to him
or let him game me by a sudden innocuous advantage
 
he was not latent
                             the things he spoke of teeming in his skull were unsavory  and repugnant
though I might suppose one couldnt expect more from a man who was darkly infected
a considerable pustule  trembling near breaking  shining  and swollen    and vile

he could see that in a glass  if he truly looked
as he often took himself in
                                            yet he was unaffected  and uninhibited


so I did what I did because I wanted to   I didnt have to 
he was assuredly  evidently  very fond of her

I didnt have to  for lack of a better word  seduce her
but I did it to incite him
I wanted to incite him

Incite him
                as much his disgust incited me 

                                                                                     besides   she was drawn to me
as much as I was to her
if asked  we would admit our mutual attraction
but whose business was it  to ask such a question
 
why wouldnt we exploit our commiserate attributes      and bodies



he saw
and roiled ferociously

not that he had a right to do so
                                                   but then he was a man of the cloth  and likely he understood
that it was his right alone
   
and that  sensibility  was not lost on me
Id seen his corruption his side glances before I was ever introduced to him
a wild  unjustified  look of hatred glaring out of the corner of his eye
brusque  out the side of his face
                                                    that he hid when you came up to him and looked him in the eye

secreting his hand
his intentions



at top of the hill he trembled

the Dark  his ally and enabler  was escaping
cheated by the rising sun

he wouldnt dare attempt anything in light of day
No  not exposed
or apparent



the last I heard and saw of him was a dreadful cry  then the stomp of his heavy boots as he hurtled down the hill past the brush where I laid

he took long strides
his heels biting the earth
descending
                   he slammed into the barbed wire strands he had unrolled to skirt the hill and prevent my escape
he tore them up
unearthed their posts
and the whole of it                                                                                                          
                               flashed  and bounced     trailing in his mad flight

a remarkable train behind its black apex



and before him
as if I dreamed
                           mottled horses ran  snorting  and tossing their dreadlocked manes
                                                                                                             



AM dream,  Wednesday,  4  2. 15
1319,  Saturday,  7  2. 15
2152,  Sunday,  8  2. 15

7.2.15



--   Whaddahell    Three times
threetimes this evening
Ya got my attention
Im with ya Im with ya

Awright now 
                    whatcha got to say  where ya goin widdis huh

ONCE  
           in slick oil oozed into a puddle  marbling  rainbowhued  on a twist  lit up by the neon signage coming off the gym

TWICE
            on a tree as he walked past it  caught his attention  lingered  he adjusted his gym bag slung over his shoulder  an outgrowth low on its hoary trunk  sticks of saplings  no bigger round than his little finger  winding braiding themselves together in a thatch
                                                                                           
THREE TIMES
                        on the condensation on the door of the steam room  its therapeutic heat chased two then three men out of the room  nearly one right behind the other  the niggling cooler air from the lockerroom twining in  adhering to the glass  disturbing the hot moisture and etching itself by its coolness


then showering   
                         ruminating on its slender unique appearances  the alertness in its spines and shoulders  the tension  the attitude of its arms and heads  Aware  keenly aware  on guard?
 
the kachinas appearing to him were on guard   suspicious
the three manifestations bore suspicion

hed be blind not to see that

pulling his shirt on over his head his exercised arms and shoulders protested
their protest was also issued with a slight groan which then always made him laugh
if they didnt protest hed beat it back down to the weight room and work them until they did

it was gonna be good to get home
throw on some jazz
fix up quinoa spiced shrimp in the shell and steamed planed vegetables
a mug of hot green tea
he earned it

and evidently 
                      the kachinas did too


he slung his bag over his right shoulder  heavier now   and he headed out the door
 
the rain had lightened to a simmering mist
lights careened madly in all possible angles  off shiny flat surfaces rounded auto bodies and wheel hubs  it shimmered up in the crowns of the trees  subdued on their wetted black trunks and exposed limbs

it moved like surreptitious insects at the umbrae and sheer of the streetlights

 
he liked walking in the rain


as he approached a lighted covered bus stop he recognized a figure outside it  unlit  hanging back towards a row of tall shrubs  their clothing wet
it began towards the sidewalk as he came
--   Hey brother . . .
                         Not your brother  he thought  that irritated him  the assumption identity
the hell he didnt refer to his own brothers as brother 
                               . . . help a brother out . . .                                                                                  
                                                                  Help a brother out  that was as bad as someone asking a favor and concluding the ask with a thank you  assuming youd grant it  when a favor has to be agreed to before a thank you then ought to be tendered

the honeycoloured light cast by the fixtures in the bus stop cut in front of his hooded head  obscured his face  though exposed his forearms  the sleeves raggedly cut away
he held his right arm back
                                                                        . . . a few bucks ought to do it you look like you got a few bucks to spare . . .      
                                       on his left forearm  nearest him  a tattoo
a badly-executed kachina

--   Im not your brother  he spat
                                     . . . the brother came on  picking up his pace
he wasnt asking
                           and in that evaporating second he slipped his bag down from his slinged shoulder bringing it between the two of them
it took the brunt of a vicious punch to his belly
gripping his bag in both hands he banged him bodily with it  then yanked it to the right as he brought his left fist up and caught him heavily on the eye

hoodie reeled

he followed with a heavy right to the bridge of his nose  his head still jacked around from the concussion of his left

hoodie was out on his feet
brother went over like a tree 
 
he was almost grateful for his hood  and maybe  if he had hair  not a skinhead  it might absorb some of the blow as the back of his head slapped on the sidewalk

                                                                                                             he didnt have a cellphone
his hands hurt  there was no give in the handles he held his bag by
What the hell
                      jogging he was probably a little over five minutes from the stop
if the brother came to in the meantime he might beat the cops 
                                                                                                     he might beat the rap



he went up the timbered backporch to his second storey apartment and let himself in off the housekey he babypinned to the hem of his pullover shirt

setting his bag down on the red Formica and chrome kitchen table he turned towards the telephone on the wall

midturn  he stopped    
                                 arrested

he turned back to the table  his bag dripping on it

he caught  something  in the soft overhead light

in the side of his bag

stuck in the side of his bag was a kitchen utility knife






he could make the bus stop in less than five
                                                                       he could


he could give him his knife back




No  he thought 
                        Let the brother bleed





2204,  Saturday,  7  2. 15