one of these days

the lyrics                                 braying as clear as a bell from the radio head

were Compelling                       

                            but oh no please   not oneadesedazes

not oneadesedazes  

                                    No

hed had his fair share of them

                                                  and looking back over their strewn wreckage  their inspired havoc

he was grateful he had the fortune to be one of those who could look back

for some of his cohorts he looked back at werent here 

they were fixed like stone mile markers along a lost highway that reminded him where he passed   how far he had come since

                                                           and how endlessly surprised he was he had

his oneadesedazes were intensely myopic

and it wasnt that his sensibilities had morphed he never assumed he was owed  or owned anything more than the day he was in

                                                                    that  in itself  was a bona fide bargain

and if he closed his eyes in his bed tonight  really very nice

and if he closed his eyes in someone elses bed tonight  then even better

they were the small things of living he cherished

so he took them  into those beds with him  his thoughts of them  who would have genuinely loved to be a part of it now

                                                                                Time   and Death   couldnt kill that

anymore that an older man or woman might take their eyes off a younger woman or man who reminded them of someone from their youth

they were older

they werent dead

and on odd nights   he relaxed and reminisced in his head to himself

the pickings fewer now

and furthur between

they hadnt kept track of one another  which was a good thing

because then they couldnt finger each other even if they wanted to

and some probably did

  

against the backs of his eyelids  the cheap seats  he realeyesed their highway again and watched keenly so not to run over its lost souls
who held onto their youth without malice jealousy or spite and capriciously reminded him that really  very little separated them
 

sometimes

                  they took one anothers hands and laughed like they laughed then

hyena laughter  sputtering spittle and going breathless   then gulping fat blue air

Oneadesedazes I oughta!

I oughta

he didnt oughta   he did

afternoon,  Wednesday,  4  2. 15

  1308,  Friday,  6  2. 15

he was intrigued

tabula rasa 

                    and imagined that it was that thing that appeared on the television screen after midnight 

at the end of broadcasting day when television stations signed off  

“. . this is the Seal of Good Practice . . We at Channel 2 are subscribers to the National Association of Broadcasters . . assur(ing) you of the high standards for the television programs designed to entertain and inform you . .” 

                                              then  a Native American Indians head  --  it seemed an odd choice for a lingering test pattern  --  appeared   then  behind it played the United States National Anthem 

   

                                                                                  which seemed an even odder choice

he wondered  occurring together  if they poked a stick in the eye of Native Americans or if it subtly documented an emerging sense of entitlement that the Republic wolfed down with its sugar-coated cereal or bacon and eggs and toast for breakfast or was otherwise  a wiseguys testament to a lively sense of irony  or its black polished patent leather humor

they threw him for a loop 

                                          while no one bothered to hold the end of the lasso or tie it off

                                                                                                                

at the conclusion of the National Anthem his favorite part ensued     the tabula rasa

the music stopped

the Indian head test pattern held

then soon    a piercing high-frequency radio tone sounded   utterly fascinating him

Radio   Television   were conjoined fraternal twins or a twinheaded monster

he didnt know that a good portion of what he saw on television then was repurposed and once upon a time radio shows

                                         the Philco television his family stoically watched  --  a hand-me-down from an affluent uncle  --  was built inside what seemed a yesteryear wooden radio cabinet   its small television screen  the actors appearing on it  were enlarged by a magnifying glass suspended in front of the screen

 

under the rabid tone a granular gray noise spazzed onto the screen  sparkling then deficient  which  if he watched  concentrated on it long enough  something inevitably emerged

and away they run together  shedding feathers behind them with a happy abandon and recklessness

their bonds and physicality the planets physics stubbornly attempted to deny

and try as he may  assured the planet was female  he couldnt cajole tempt or seduce her to forego the arranged marriage she so energetically  tirelessly  served   seemingly without a braid of joy

or perhaps she was a seasoned actress who wore warpaint redolent of a brave

they glared and stood across from one another at loggerheads

without another choice he defied her

he danced with the buzzing black and white pixels the mad crowding hive through the fractures and cracks of what seemed was a hard durable face 

the clean slate

though nothing ever shapes up  clean

its touched and fingered

if one looked hard enough it exhibited whorls and arches  bifurcations and divergences

and as with a babes eyes   once their eyes were able to focus

one would be a fool to imagine that inside them     it was snowdrifted

                                                           a pale bluewhite innocence looking back at you

hed been there once   and wondered 

                                                            What are you looking at

the tabula rasa might be nothing more than polished glass

 

1600-ish,  Twosday,  3  2. 15