he walkedup on the corner 

                            a huge intersection  had a pedestrian crossing button which he pressed three times WAIT WAIT WAIT it said 

he wondered whose voice it was when he met people he provoked them in conversation to utter wait so he could compare  

when the light changed so he could proceed it never said GO nothing  he wished there was a leadup  RUNNERS ON YOUR MARK  GET SET  GO 

                              had he designed the system it would have had a hyper interactive Crossing Guard

RUN FORREST RUN then fuck with the timing so it wasnt 30 seconds every time a pedestrian crossedYES 

                                                                                                                occasionally slow elderly or disabled people entered the crosswalk  the illuminated countdown runs outtheyre halfway cross the lights change  would really get blood churning through their veins 

Comon when was the last time they got a rush like that

                                                           HELL ol folk probably forgot what adrenaline is 

hed put a hop in their step or not

certainly would make traffic cautious 

                                        its one thing callously running over cat opossum squirrel raccoon  but damages inflicted by deer human beings  devastating 

   standing on the corner running all sorts of shit through his mind he noticed on the traffic light arched over the lanes coming from the west that he was waiting to stop so he could cross were two big scrubjays 

                                                                                                looking mighty prehistoric looking  like raptorsOHNO  velociraptors Jurassic Park fame  

both fixing him in their eyes 

                             Brother had been awhile since he felt like meat 

not since he acquiesced took a friends girlfriends little sister to her senior prom  word was through the grapevine that little sister had turned down all askers she had the hots for him

she wasnt necessarily his flavour a redhead  though he did like her freckles

                                                                                  I really dig your freckles he told her at dinner after prom 

they didnt dine where arrangements had been made by the prom committee 

she said was cool

 

   when they pulledup in front of her house at the end of the night he went around behind the car to her door to open it for her

        in the while she slipped out of her dresslost her bra and panties

opening the door she stomped her foot on the concrete Leverage  yanked him inside on top of her then jujitsu he was under her 

             no  some people don cry out when theyre rapedJesus 

MEAT 

   he kept his eyes on the ball

watched them watch him

a car crossing traffic with him backfiredfrightened the raptors they peeledoff left  north  he finished crossing the intersection walking backwards 

                                     he didnt trust them 

MEAT

1225,  Monday,  10  4. 23

1222, Reggaefriday – ffuull Flower Moon – Cinco de Mayo,  ‘23

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bSMxl1V8FSg

hes from Texas . . ought to know

15:27 minute-mark  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KyWxcQgBRkQ 

Texas Senator John Cornyn vouching for Supreme Court Justice Thomas and billionaire Harlan Crow  . . . honorable men 

   if honorable 

                 hed love to hear Cornyn tell of those who are dishonorable 

Shame  but 

              hes wellaware photogenic preening Republican celebrities have no shame

then to really bundle his horseshit in a ribbon an bow Cornyn suggests this current assault on Thomas’ ethics is 32years in the making  the continuation of Thomas’ Senate confirmation hearing  Anita Hill  . . . a hi-tech lynching of a black nominee

          O Cornyn  you can blow me

 

                                                                                              1712,  Thursday,  4  5. 23

leaning over to pick it up off the gravel poorly maintained road he thought someone was going to be really upset  probably put their iPhone on the roof of the car and drove off forgetting they had

it was straitjacketed tucked inside a safety case

it was still on locked

                      hed finish walking to the market and on the way home drop it at the police station he assumed they had the technologythey had a sophisticated ex-military armored riot vehicle to get into it before the battery ran cold 

it was fully charged

standing upright he tossed it into a Trader Joes canvasbag that hung over his shoulder

before he went back to the book he was reading as he walked he slipped out a halffolded piece of paper he carried inside it to make notes to write the addresses east west sides of the street two apartment complexes he wasnt that good a Samaritan to rap on door  so happens in this red town fearful town an unexpected rap coud get one shot 

Why do you keep living there, Dad? his girls asked  You have nothing in common with the majority of them.

I do I do  They irritate me so I irritate them

   noted he put the paper back in the book but before he began reading he caught out the corner of his eye the next house south  east side 

                         a twostorey flatfaced dull brown house no invitation there not even to Trick or Treat if that were a thing anymore it squat on the foremost lefthand corner immediately after the dirt drive that ran there was no garage up along the side of the house and behind it a sixfoot vertical plank fence began it looked like a line of cemetery wood gravemarkers over the top of it he saw rusted corrugated outbuildings beyond  it was easy a square acre lot easy 

searching his memory he couldnt say hed seen as foreboding a house outside a ghost town 

                                                                                                 ghosts would be receptive

his were

          made it their business to remind him he was only renting their house 

My spooks likely he thought wouldnt want any part of this joint 

   bringing the book up to his face he began readingwalking again had no sense of being watched 

                                                                                                          ghostless

 

1235,  Monday,  10  4. 23

1407,  Thursday,  4  5. 23

Man  theres something you don see every day 

                                                  he was leaning over the bridge railing looking down into the creek  it was subsiding  not two weeks earlier it had breached its hard droughtdried edges gobbled earth cut concave banks altered its waterway created new benches bars fell old trees

What are you looking at?Jesus . . . look at all the crap.

Yah Were slobs

Is that a mattress?

wedged under two fallen trees opposite banks crisscrossed

Yup

Look at all that shit the creek aint big.

No

      The proverbial everything and  and  the kitchen sink 

The homeless flednot a hope in hell of gathering their things  I understand ya can see water was up eightnine feet from wha were lookin at

                       Ma Natures fury

   It looks like a panicked washerwomans line  disorderly   crap flung over it helter-skelter

Nobody died.

I don know havent heard though asya know it was broadcasted an atmospheric river  Paints a helluva picture 

Id also assume city county shelters woudave laid the law down apprised people It was an imminent threat

You looking for anything particular?

Puttycoloured things spoiling

Putty people.

Mebbe bleu cheese 

OhChrist. 

Beyond His help

  Jesus.

              And that said I’m sorry, you said something you don’t see every day?

This oak left tha downswept branch

Yes.

Follow it  Yasee it

  O man.

Not every day

Ohhell no.

eight feet above the quick water a black bra swayed from a tip of a smaller branch

1405,  Thursday,  13  4. 23

1044,  Thursday,  4  5. 23

https://www.noaa.gov/stories/what-are-atmospheric-rivers 

Missouris abysmal mistake 

                              HEY, I’ve got an idea! We can ban books, defund libraries, it’s our way or the highway.

https://www.npr.org/2023/05/04/1173274834/book-bans-library-funding-missouri-texas-ashcroft?utm_source=Sailthru&utm_medium=email&utm_campaign=Lit%20Hub%20Daily:%20May%204%2C%202023&utm_term=lithub_master_list

   and thats the way it works 

                                Republicans have held the gerrymandered-reins of state for 20 years  supermajority of the houses                                           

it don make them Supermen Superwomen 

                                                Superarbiters

from where he stoodway he grewup  deybe WRONG 

                                                        taught to read by his parents very young no book ever taken off the menu dinner table conversation every night evenif his father dismissed him without dinner for his adamant stance against Vietnam his parents had no intentions of raising lopsided ignorant children whoif they chose also wouldnt raise slouches

       

1004,  Thursday,  4  5. 23

https://www.newstribune.com/news/2022/nov/10/republicans-maintain-supermajority-in-missouri/ 

Amendment 3  https://www.brennancenter.org/our-work/research-reports/gerrymandering-away-missouris-future

it rained forty days and forty night 

   nah it didnt 

                 however to live in Californiafour years drought  two days heavy rain winds   it felt like forty

the earth a drowning man unable to absorb it unable to breathe it shed the rain

runlets creeks burgeoned 

two days later he went to the creek 

the erosion was devastating

                              from a downturned tree limb eight feet now above the testy rapid water a black bra hung from its strap 

homeless setup camps along the creekbed

he kept his eyes peeled for colour that looked like flesh

there wasnt a tit in the bra

before the next storm struck the sun exercised its brilliance ferociously probably knowing itd be shuttered again  another twothree days

                          kings majesties do not like to share their realms

walkingreading he crossed on the street between the towns historical City Hall and the Mall the fountain at its feet

people families friends gathered on the grass he glancedright returned to his book  his locomotion checked himceased Don be an asshole LOOK 

                            slipping his finger in the bookfiguring it best not to cross his unconsciousconsciousness he looked again  let the book hang from his hand like poorlyhooked bait 

                                                                          aahSEURAT  he woudave been enthused the Mall The Island of La Grande Jatte in its pointillistic splendor 

                                                                  he thought Seurat because he and his kid brother used their paper route money   Hey Maw! We’re heading out to play!   You’re not back for lunch, dinner’s at 5, you’re late no dinner.   they yelled We know! as the screened backdoor slapped home behind them they took the train into city summers to visit The Art Institute of Chicago The Island was part of its permanent collection  the painting created by daubs of paintTWO YEARS TO CREATE  blew their minds

the mall fountain would suffice for the river Seine

his brother was head over heels for Jatte

he preferred Landscape at Saint-Ouen oil on panel rough brushstrokes  also the three vowels in a row O U E excited him 

     Hey man shaddup, you know how oeuvre affects me.

Yeah do, damn near sexual, can almost imagine you jacking off to it.

he nodded 

            Yah.  Almost.

his locomotion stutterstepped 

                               his unconsciousconsciousness asked Arent ya glad ya stopped  See it fire off a cascade of memory neurons

   he nodded wasnt often he was taken offstride by his greased innerworkings 

                                                                                     Thank you

 

Yare welcome  Thank you for paying heed

1252,  Thursday,  13  4. 23

1603,  day-between-2-Ts,  3  5. 23

I was thinking . .

                  her smiled stopped him You’re always thinking. You exhaust me. I know you must turn it off I just don’t know when.

pointing at his skull  A perpetual motion machine 

                                                     Its a happy merry-go-round a carousel  I just ride roundanround refuse to grab the brass ring

When I was little I did.

You get the ring

No. I fell broke my arm. 

Ouch

she giggled That learned me. 

                                  You were saying you were . . thinking. 

Yah

       I was thinking if I was water I woud prefer not to be absorbed My hydrogens oxygen dissipated devolved

her eyes widened What made you think of that?

You remember the heavy rain two weeks three ago

Yes. Rain here is memorable.

Yah 

       Theres a fenced-in empty lot beside a pizzeria on the way to the market dirt weeds don even grow in it an a huge puddle formed Its growing smaller evaporating being absorbed bit by bit  So slow . . 

. . It reminds you of death.

   Yah 

           A slow death Lacks quality

The quality of life.

Verses quantity

Yes.

If you were water whawoud you prefer

Boiled.

1455,  day-between-2-Ts,  12  4. 23

1209, day-between-2-Ts,  3  5. 23

she startled him

                      enough to wake him

he laid there still  eyes closed

if he opened his eyes shed be there

if he did an she wasntwhich is what he expectedknew 

                                                          shed break his heart again 

hed have to pick up the pieces again glue them back together  again

                                                                             funny

hearts can be glued back together as many times as theyre broken

as many times as one has the will to endure 

he could still hear her voice  her words 

                                           Dadu . . I love you to death.

lying there he listened for her breath

 

   no

a mariachi gently  Just open your eyes  You know

he did

she wouldnt be there

he was dreaming

 

   he opened themshe wasnt 

she loved him to death

   hell love her until he dies

b4 7AM,  day-between-2-Ts,  3  5. 23

1111,  day-between-2-Ts

Janis Joplin – Big Brother & the Holding Company  Piece of My Heart  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SCngPse1iiI 

Supreme ethics

All power tends to corrupts

And absolute power corrupts absolutely

                                           it ought to shouldnt it 

Let them 

          insist Senators Blackburn TN  Tom Cot Ton AR  Cornyn TX  Cruz TX  Hagerty TN  Hawley MO  Rubio FA  Hyde-Smith AL  Wicker MS  Britt AK  Boozman AR 

1939,  Twosday,  2  5. 23

Intimidation my ass  https://www.blackburn.senate.gov/2023/5/blackburn-leads-gop-effort-to-protect-supreme-court-justices-from-intimidation#:~:text=Senator%20Blackburn%20was%20joined%20by,(R%2DArk.).

openingup Shakespeare opened him up to a whole different world than the one he inhabited 

writers do that 

send him spinning 

giglet

       wanton lascivious woman cant order one through Amazon yet

coxcomb 

          conceited fouish person fop in French fou adj crazy foolish hence  fouish    

clackdish

           dish with a moveableHemingway lid carried by beggars who clack the lid to attract notice 

Didya see the size of tha clackdish

Clackdish? I’ve no idea what you’re talking about.

The busker using his guitar case

What’s a busker?

he was going to ask Really but his slack countenanceexpression spoke louder than words

                                                                                       A street performer plays in public places for gratuities

For money?

Yes an otherwise

What’s other than money?

Havent heard singing for ones supper 

No.

he was asking this time Really

Yes really.

The band Mamas an Papas performed it

Couldn't say I'm familiar.

Really he was more than a little discouragedmiffed by the failing alacrity with which he asked Really 

                                                                                                               Born under a rock

I dismay you.

No Your parents dismay me

Don’t let 'em, never knew ‘em, I’m an orphan.

why didnt he know thabeen workin as a labourer beside him three months 

                                                                        Orphanage orphan  

   I don’t know of any other. Chicago, many moons ago. 

                                                            Product of too, too many foster homes. Like the tallest scooped ice cream cone yaever laid eyes on. Nobody wanted to buy the goods.

I apologise I didnt know

Not usually something I’m forthcoming with, but you said parents.

                                                                      Not everyone grows up like you did. I think the same. Meeting another orphan shocks me. Sometimes I thinkbelieve . . I’m the only onewish . I was the only one.

With Dobbs my kind is about to flourish.

I hope the state governments are financially up to the task. They can’t point their fingers elsewhere, can they?    

1014,  Thursday,  19  1. 23

1456,  Twosday,   2  5. 23

Mamas & Papas  Sing for Your Supper  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oZrdkm_7IEE

   Jesus  You watched tha

Yes. his head bobbed bobbleheaded  awfully suggestive that he hadnt a choice

Whywoudya do tha

I have a hard time believing you didn’t all the guys I know did.

   You know me 

                 I didntI woudnt  no one coud make me   Not for all the tea in China No

When would I be able to have the opportunity agai . .

. . Again

        Are you shittin meyare sick  Hits on their sites only inciteencourage them

Watch  Yave helped provide many more opportunities 

                                                             Wha a fuck 

Careful. 

Carefulwha 

             Yawanna dance Im happy to slap you aroundmaybe knock some sense into your thick skull  Id rather watch people fuck than be murdered beheaded terrorised tortured  Whawere you thinking 

                                                                                                     Enjoy it 

No.  It was horrible.

Anya cant unsee whaya saw 

                                   Canya 

No. I had nightmares have nightmares.  Then occasional I’ll daydream it too.

Payin an awful price

I suppose . . 

. . Don spose  Yare 

                     Did it to yourself   Ive no pity 

No pity. Wow. 

                   Why didnt you watch it? 

War pornography 

                   Has no appeal 

Besides

I have an aversion a revulsion to violent avulsions 

                                                         I reckon its from the Drivers Ed films I was required to watch  Fuck me 

After one  cuttingup a human brain 

                                        The cafeteria served meatloaf 

To this day I believe Drivers Ed the cafeteria ladies colluded

316preferred,  Reggaefriday,  14  4. 23

1317,  Twosday,  2  5. 23

De Niro  Travis Taxi Driver 

                               stands before a fulllength mirror  You . . youah . you talkin’ to me? 

he isnt talking to himselfhis reflection

looking over his reflected right shoulder hes talking to me

You we made eyecontact  you talkin’ to me?

   No 

Im not even in the room

                         my reflection evaporatessteams away Travis turns to particlesmotes vanishes without a trace

in my head sticks and stones I shake my head  it sounds like a childs rattle 

                                                                                    I hadnt said sticks and stonesNo

I said to no onenot myself 

                            I didnt say   I dreamed it thin stick

thin stick branches

it came on like that the beginning of a phrase written in a neat handlegible on the back of my eyelids  white chalk black board 

        thin stick branches brittle capillaries help respiring loaves of leaflungs 

photosynthesis 

                 carbon dioxide water suns energy  become sugar

in return exhales oxygen 

does not participate in zero-sum relationships 

thin stick branches brittle capillaries help respiring loaves of leaflungs 

                                                                           nicely printed

over and over again like a child at school being punished for something Write it on the board fifty times

how many times did he stay afterschool writing something on the board fifty timeshe was incorrigible  a hunredtimes 

once she was marriedMrs Keever  maybe her husband was away on a business trip twohunredfifty times  accurate punctuation spelling 

he snuck in errors

she caught them

                  he had no idea how many times he wrote the sentence one would think hed remember it he didnt get home until after darkmissed dinner

                                      his father asked wryly  How was school today, son? he was being rhetorical  You missed a tasty dinner. The dishes are waiting for you. 

he washed dried put everything away then went upstairs to his bedroom sat at his desk and did his homework

   the printing ceased  the lines were virtually exact same size letterspacing end on end line after line after line

he was impressed

it wasnt his handwriting 

he woke 

           wrote it down so he wouldnt forget

b4 7AMish,  Monday,  1  5. 23

1023, Twosday,  2  5. 23

Octopus Diver  Space Train  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GIvUOR_iQhY

a thought

gunviolence

massshootings

F E A R

           in all the debatesconversations hes heard the squeeze is on Citizenry to giveup giveaway their choice of weapons 

why woud they want such weapons   

                                          F E A R 

his thought 

             Parity

the State has weapons of war

Citizenry has learnedbeen instructed to fear the State

    Parity 

Citizenry may giveup weapons of war if the State the Police we aint talkin Military  the State  To Defend and Serve Public Safety

               if the State were to diminish their appetiterelinquish their war weapons the Citizenry woud have an incentive to follow suit

State de-escalation

F E A R comes down

Citizenry relaxes its trigger finger 

   just  a  thought

  

626preferred,  Moanday,  1  5. 23

Ari Melber  7:11 of 8:51  184 massshooting in 121 days https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0sfXE0q-PRU

Here take a second 

                         Lemme read to you

Gimme the book, I can read myself.

Yes but by your own admission you cant do more than one thing at a time So Ill read an you can listen

shook his head irritated lion  Don’t treat me like a kid.

You drew the ground rules Im playing byem Its simple reading an comprehension All you gotta do is comprehend  Do one thing 

           You can do tha yah

 

the irritation should have lessened but it didnt 

Awright  We good 

   Make your point.

Listening he wanted to buy him some time to let the blood quit pounding in his ears  Its important to our argument wha shoudbe our mutual discernment

Go. 

       Go ahead I’m listening. 

It begins A but Im imposing AI 

                                “(AI) simulation. 

“Sort of. More like a translation, though . . . The fidelity is never one hundred percent. You’re relying on one neural network to interpret another, and then . . . working from that interpretation. Distortion is inevitable. And the simulation is always a reduction of the original. It’s easy for (an) AI simulator to misinterpret the data in the original and miss something (very) important.” 

What’s your point?

You hang your hat on AI feel its some kind of Godsend a deliberative means you insist is more than adequate to instruct us human beings how to get alonghow to act correctly 

It cant It aint human

It’s a tool.

No argument A power tool not a hand tool 

                                                  he rapped his skull three times with a finger Intelligence Verses artificial intelligence  Yarather sleep with a real woman or a customised sized sighed  Japanese sex dollFack was making him listen an think same time  simulating synchronisation not stimulating him He No Can Do My apologises get carried away talk too fast

                   

   looked like his head was spinning

shortly after Noon,  Sunday,  30  4. 23

0959,  Monday – May Day,  1  5. 23

pg185  The Mountain in the Sea  Ray Nayler

https://www.bbc.com/worklife/article/20180720-this-company-specialises-in-talking-ai-powered-sex-dolls