Do you want to die? 

                      she asked him in black deathly earnest

her questionquestion bumrushed him

                                     doused his sensibilities in slick icewater surged his Aries defiance quickened his mad heart curled the bluegas aura that tided his brain shivered the ghostlywhite mitochondrial sheath cloaking his nervous system stemtostern

wasnt a question you want to field if youre not in the drivers seat

she was driving

                all sorts of exit strategies littered the highway concrete embankments overpasses railroad tracks bridges jumps rollovers perhaps a spectacular fiery crash that snuffs innocent lives thats a joke son a joke few who drive are innocent

she had the wheel

he ragedwas furious inside

poker face

            No I do not want to die  that opened a door he knew it 

                                                                       but whats he to say Yah sure  Commit suicide take me with you because I wanna go    nothing in the affirmative

if he killed her later no one would believe he was provokedhow she provoked him 

                                                                                      Do you want to die?

he didnt ever want to die

Lifes a good gig most of the time

shed been ill too longillegitimately tampered with to remember

                                                                 no matter how he babied her tried to humour her tried anyfuckinthing that occurred to him that might be joyous  redeeming

 

I see a red door and I want to paint it black.  

 

1320approximately,  Twosday,  14  6. 22

Beatles  Tomorrow Never Knows  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pHNbHn3i9S4

Stones  Paint It Black  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DmmCwSqNbl4

Wow look at thatthat lizard there  crazy small tail   Stumpy

Awcomon . . I know you know that these lizards can lose their tail to escape a predator. Tail comes off, twitches, the cat whahavyou fixates on it, the lizard makes a getaway, saves itself.

he took a breathrolled his eyes  Yah I know

Pretty phenomenal . . Nature’s way . crazy.

An amazing adaption Woudlove to see how it evolved

Ain’t that the truth.

   Yes it exited flat   he was distracted

That was a queer yes.

he nodded

Thinking on somethingsomething's occurred to you?

he nodded again

he sat back  Something . I’m going to find . . ridiculous?

his eyes clearedwas present again laundry washed rinsed hung out to dry  Not necessarily

Do tell.

 Yes  Intend to

                    Adaptation  Evolution

Which we acknowledg . .

. . Better yet

Better yet? Your betters tend to be strange.

I colour outside the lines

You had coloring books?  incredulous

I did not for long

                  Too confining

A coloring book confin . .

. . Lines borders bondage  Confining

I loved coloring.

I betya did

                Wanna hear me out givinya a choice

I’m trying to decide.

                       I appreciate you asking rather than your usual bumrush.           

Might suppose it depends on the bum  he smiled broadly

he didnt smile  Thanks.

Yabetcha

           Here we go . .

. . Can’t wait . .

. . Don be a pill

  Pill?  Who says that?

Just didEVOLUTION  Hear me out

I hear you out more often than you hear me.

Indeed

        But its not often ya have imaginings worth listening to

his face went slack

Quit with the Im dead look Reiterating isnt magical thinking wondering  Recitation Ya havent taught in years

possibly his face went more slack

Jaysus

          Evolution

Ya with me

I hear ya. 

 

Testing one two three . .

. . I said I hear ya. mirthless  humorless

Its unfortunate women havent the ability lizards do Creep at a bar hit on them boozeemboldened gets handsy feely touchy  grabs ass

                    Woman steps aside tail comes off fuck fascinated fixates  predacious  Anoff she goes to the powder room out the door leaves creep to the brief artifice of twitch

Problem solved

Standinground with a dead tail at your feet is damning 

                                                           Doncha think

I don’t think.

              I’m not even sure what you're saying qualifies as thinking.

Not thinking Imagining

Imagining with all your secret little cretins?

My roving Mariachi band banditsYah

                                        Imagining Yaoughta try it some time  Get the bug out of yer ass

suntime,  Thursday,  9  6. 22

1121,  Twosday,  14  6. 22

Now thas thinkin he said to himself 

                                      he might have to toss business her way wasnt a big shopfront small bay likely twothree chairs intimate 

                           like the intimacy of its name  written in bright red cursive neon partially obscured as he rolled buh bye adobe posts supporting a Spanish tile porch roof 

                                                             Shady Blonde Salon

he could dig a shady lady his barber would understand

they could take turns

at home he looked it up on the computer

couldnt find it on San Anselmo

found Suave Blonde Salon

he pausedcalculated

                      Suave Shady  he distinctly saw the S and a likely his eyes manoeuvred the v into a y  Suave Shady  Whellshit 

                      That changed things

So youre gonna blow it off without a deep dive

                                                one of his chippy interiorterror characters that insist on keeping him on his toes

Interloper I only thought That changed thi . .

. . We heard you loud and clear a bosuns whistle a gunsho . .

. . Hanging on my every word

Yamightsay

             Don pass things through us well take the initiative  pass them through you   Whad it change

Suave aint Shad . .

. . But yaint been inside

Theres tha  grantya tha

Then grant us an audience with the proprietor 

                                                 She may not be proper

An improper proprietor . .

. . Yes  a passionate prying improper proprietor

Yare really tryin to sell me

Yamiss every shot ya don take

Yado

We learned that from youNauhwha 

                                      Ya gonna let us down

Put it thaway I really cant

Nauh ya cant

out of the mouth of babes

he dropped his six year barber

                                 C’est la vie

1340,  Thursday,  9  6. 22

1416,  Monday,  13  6. 22

Robbie Nevil  C’est La Vie  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=22_gslQ4cS4

Lady Marmalade  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8sLsqLjz63M

usually the afflicted disabled handicapped attracted him

being the eldest of nine kids forced his handhe couldnt help being a big brother he excelled at it                                                                                                                              must have been a born caregiver

walking into the supermarket parking lot off main street he saw a person perched in a wheelchair beside a curbed island near the crosswalk which lead to the markets threshold

traffic slowed as it neared them

they did not roll forward

the hesitating cars then cautiously proceeded across the angled yellowpainted crosswalk

his first thought was they needed helpwere possibly waiting on their attendant it was odd to see them solo

                                                                                                                he quickened his pace needed to quell his and traffics apparent discomfort 

their cap barely showed above the back of the wheelchair from between the wheels he could see their feet turned awkwardly on the rests

more cars rolledup passed gibberishly  confounded

closing to within fifteen meterscontinually looking for someone who might be their aide he pulled upstep stammered  stopped an enormous plume of vapesmoke roiled into the air above them

                                                                             they began puffing like a little locomotive 

The Little Engine That Could

Whellshit God helps those who help themselves

                                                   Aesop mused alike in his fable Hercules and the Wagoner or Hercules and the Carter “Put your shoulder to the wheel . . . urge on your horses. Do you really think you can move the wagon by simply looking at it and whining . . . ? Hercules really he spoke of himself in third person ill-eism ill-eist  Jesus will not help unless you make some effort to help yourself.”

from his deadstop he coursecorrected angled across the traffic lane passing to their left at two carwidths difference  she did not look well  worse with the vape pen stuck in her puss

from there he called loudly to her Maam are you in need of help

she heard him  

she feigned she didnt

he always kept his eyes on the belly button didnt fall for head fakes 

her belly button didnt answerdidnt say

she wasnt helping herself

he wouldnt either

that grated him

 

collected his items leaving the market  she was not there

had she smoked cigarettes butts would have verified her existence

                                                                      now absencegone he decided to believe his eyes despite their inconsistencies trickery

they would have had to work very hardOvertimeImaginatively to summons a gnarled gnome vaping in a wheelchair at a crosswalk

suntime,  Thursday,  9  6. 22

1119,  Monday,  13  6. 22

 

  Hypotheticals.

                      wanna give someone a shot in the armwake em up  Whaif?regurgitatedsplashed on their brand new blue suede shoes 

                   Horrors

awright hed play  he was pleasantly loaded 

                                                 Whaif wha

Whaif cautiously he scratched the end of his noseit was feeling Pinocchioish Whaif we deal in wha is . . not ifs?

Hard Dicks and scientists try 

Dicks? his nose felt funny but it hadnt grown

Detectives in pursuit of what is whawas The facts ma’am, please, just the facts. however deploying hypotheticals to hone their pursuit eliminate other courses or explanations 

                                                              Yasee cuz I believe you can the necessity an value despite your displeasure

Dicks and scientists . . I kinda like that. 

There ya have it yare halfway there 

                                      Youll excuse my interruption 

Sure. You’re excused.

Your nose feel okay

My nose?

Ya seemed concerned

Oh my nose . . . yes . my nose . .

. . You were trying to pick a fight

No . . I was trying to be stimulating.

                                        I didn’t succeed.

You did not

            You can appreciate they are a way of trying to pull the truth out asif telling the truth is somehow verboten ya tipped your hand If the playing field were simply being honest we woudnt have to try to game each other playGOTCHA

I like em

Politicians despise them.

There are two kinds of people

                                Human beings and politicians 

This wasnt as stimulating as I thought it would be.

Well smoke another bowl see whaelse presents 

                                                    Any other thoughts

I can’t say, I’m disappointed.

just before he fired it up

                          Give this a thought In the furnace of affliction I have chosen thee

Christ.

Close

         Banner of Heaven  

1823,  Sunday,  5  6. 22

1111,  Sunday,  12  6. 22

Zeppelin  Your Time Is Gonna Come  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5cvEVivHVsU

Coldplay  Politik  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tHlYLt7Vt2c

Ya cant unsee whaya saw

                                 wasnt pithy wise  commonsensical    

Why ya do that to yourself

Friends had . .

. . They arent friends 

                         They didnt want to suffer their selfinflicted grievances alone Misery loves company

I suspect yave heard that werent born yesterday

                                                     Though sometimes I wonder  Truly

I wasn’t thi . .

. . No yawerent

                  I cant count the number of times yave pleaded that  When ya gonna start

he shook his head like a sad dog bad ears  You’d think I’d know better.

hed let it drift  a crappy rope of exhaled vape

  he had nothing furthur to say

                                    Im gonna leave you to your misery Got things to do

looked like he wanted to say something but cut him to the quick wagged a finger 

                                                                                     Got things to do  Catcha later man

he walked off  despair felt queer on his back

ISIL had posted beheadings online 

                                     why anyone would want to watch such horror  once in the hopper always in the hopper

cynically he hoped they dreamed it daydreamed it  that it fractured their waking hours at odd or inappropriate times

  he had no compassion  

1823,  Sunday,  5  6. 22

1258,  Saturday,  11  6. 22

the night before he dreamt he was walking down a wide flight of unmarredmarble steps 

he had no sense of where he had been immediately prior 

the stone felt cool through his leather solesfelt solemn belonged to an edifice 

unable to resistfeeling exuberant playful he descended themcrosscut them at an angle

                                                                                             they didnt feel inanimate    

descending into dappled shade cast by a grove of sycamores he felt shivers in the rock as he steppedSUDDENLYSUDDENLY tipped  disoriented

                                                        involuntarily his eyes snappedshut attempting to stave off a rising percolationdizziness  bile gathered at the back of his throat

he sighed  WAIT he didnt sigh   it sounded ancientnot in a long time uttered not in a very longlong time  cloaked in relief 

     then his sickness fled

he worked to reorient  tears blurred his vision he wiped them away with the heels of his hand

he lookedhe stood on an impossible shelf  to his left a wall towered  gingerly he approached the edge  sheer cliff  hundreds of feet to next shelf  toes at its edge he could feel a chilly updraft

                                                                                 looking left right   flat bare rock

seemed to run endlessly

SUDDENLYSUDDENLY he was exceptionally small 

                                                          the scale was perverse or comparatively he simply realised in the realm of all things he always had been 

                                            all things were taking him to task

left

right

he flipped a coin 

  maybe he could walkout

                                wouldnt know until he tried

      insignificance   tough to swallow

AM-ish,  Twosday,  7  6. 22

1152,  Saturday,  11  6. 22

he couldnt explain why it hadnt occurred to him earlier

he caught things out of the corner of his eyes frequently usually his lefthe was lefthanded rightbrain 

                                                                                                           science has tried to debunk it as myth although it acknowledgesconfirms that the right hemisphere controls attention  memory two go hand in hand reasoning  problem solving  he was cool living with the myth   he was living proof

what occurred was as he walkedreading

                                              Whahappens when that which occurs an is seen in the corner of ones eye walksround and stands frontancenter before ones face 

                                                          that something spooked him  but to have it strollround confront him made his Mariachi band recoil  quit roving  disband 

                                                           COWARDS COME BACK    YARE ON YOUR OWN MUTHAFUCKER   Motherfucker motherfucker housed provided for them all their friggin existences ADIOS adois  Ya kiddin me

Whahappens  a rhetorical question

                                       not a soul or soulless lingered to utter a reply  but it wasnt like him to put words in anyones mouth far better to have them say put their dirty foot in their mouth wha faces they made like when he swore and his parents energetically scrubbed his tongue with Fels Naptha a brown laundry soap bar tasty it wasnt  however their thorough application didnt stop him from liberally saltanpeppering his language with words as he saw fit 

   So whahappens 

                              after pondering the possibilities very likely he decided when it happened to him  whahed do  hed let herhim himher dance

                                            possibly cop a new move  enjoy a new partner

123preferred to 1323,  Reggaefriday,  10  6. 22

Stephen Marley Let Her Dance  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SAjudNmHNwk                                                          

 

  the question was innocent enough 

                                       but sometimesa lot of the time they propelled him to places hed rather not go but couldnt help himself he had a roving Mariachi band their feelers outlike an anemone feeling for food dragging it home relentlessly unapologetically   things gotta eat

she asked Have you heard of an organic cemetery?

  I have not

                 But I can easily imagine

What do you imagine?

War

War? That’s terse.  Not much of an answer.

I as you know try to be succinct

                                    Its a damn goodnear perfect descriptiondefinition

How so?

  Give it momentlet it simmer in your skull  You use your imagination its dark side

Nothing’s coming to light.

To light  Clever   Yawanna think mor . .

. . No. You obviously have a thoughtan explanation . and I’m impatient as you know.

I know yes 

             War   Battlegrounds  Killing fields Atrocities    Mass graves

                                                                                 Organic cemetery

That’s gruesome.

   It is

         Results the same save for the peace celebrant  ceremony

she shook her head  The way you think.

I cant take credit

                   I have a horde to help

suntime,  Day-between-Two-Ts,  1  6. 22

1156,  Thursday,  9  6. 22

Edwin Starr  War  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hZJRJpbGkG4  maybe not absolutely nothing

Zeppelin  No Quarter  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wdqDmJbm2eY

redlettered dimlylit EXIT floated in the chiaroscuroatmosphere of a darkened movie theatre

                                                                                                    or thats what he was lead to believe

dreams are like that

sometimes they suggest

other times they demand

this one was a real bitch

one in heat

pulled on the chilired collar around his throatYah he was cool

                                                                  she snickered when she reminded him if she pulled too tight he might not be able to say the safeword

No sweat I trust you

A lot of dead man have trusted women.

Theyre not us ya got my back You get too carried awaytoo enthralled Ill wake an your enthusiastic tugging will dump you on your ass

                  An I don want you bruising your beautiful ass

she chuckled reached outstroke his cheek with her thumb fingers under his chin

                                                                                      You’re so sweet to think of my ass. Got a great ass babe

What’s our safeword?

Fuck if I can remember

2248,  Friday,  3  6. 22

1240,  Thursday,  9  6. 22