wordswoke roused him this morning

                                            words    slick  inspired  words

paella  pariah

year  yesteryear

                  Tell me a fadograph of yesteryear etymologically Shush  a fadedphotograph from an album     

decide  deicide

sheol  shades  hades

    melancolores black darkcolored  melancholies

atrahora 

        Yare wrong bub Latin  atra deadly terrible grisly  hora plural hores hours   terrible hours

brushed on hardsavagely  devil  diabo Oo  o satanas   O podre diabo

                                                                                     mas que porra WTF

he didnt need this shit mocking himworrying his early morning head

                                                                       mussing his hair                  

they rapped on his skull from inside Excuse me, excuse me . . EXCUSE ME

just wouldnt play nice

                      wouldnt concede make soft ombromanie make handshadows on its concave walls

  instead

           they jammedcrammed his cranium  ached its arched bones fomented his frontal sparred with his parietel ogled his occipital tiffed his temporal pecked at his sphenoid wouldnt etch birds butterflies bunnies reindeer giraffes lions and tigers and bearsOhmy  on his ethoid

                                                        Porky Pig stutters Tha – Th – Th . . That’s all folks!

   then appeared   decent  descent

                                       descent in  to   madness   decent in  to   madness  involuntarily he shook his head stirred his hypnopompia  taking-its-sweet-ass-time longtime  waking    then the words failingscattered dissipating were replaced by a pitch black slate

then on it paleblue squares maybe ten across seven rowsmaybe whatever it took to fill the field on the back of his eyelids

        then paleblue questionmarks appeared one at a time inside the boxes right to left next row left to right next right to left and on an on until all the boxes were filled

   then 

            a vibration a soft jiggling   pleasant  

then randomly  questionmarks faded and were replaced by dullthenrising to rubyred checkmarks

                                                                                                     perhapsperhaps a third of the questionmarks were replaced

                                           that hung in his vision until he truly woke opened his eyes

 

he remembered the words

9ish,  Sunday,  6  2. 22

1019,  Monday,  7  2. 22

John Coltrane Quartet  Soul Eyes  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GoYAGNLqFwg

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b9434BoGkNQ

blood libel 

             just when he thought it might be safe to go into the watermight have a gripgrasp a handle on things  had become reliable

                     blood libel

how thick he must be

                        had never heard of it before

blood libel a centuries-old Arya fuckin kiddin me Centuries evidently some people were thicker than he a centuries-old false allegation that Jews murder Christians a big one Jewish deicide  Jesus especially Christian children especially never some old codger whod be easier to catch than a wily Gumby child to use their blood for ritual purposesFOR EXAMPLE shesh an ingredient in baking Passover matzah or hamantaschen looked German   Aah  name derived from two German words  mohn  poppy seed  taschen pockets mohntaschen popular German pastry dating from medieval times always spelled it medevil as a kid hamantaschen sweet pastries eaten on the holiday of Purim

                                                                              ritual purposes

ritual gnawed him  Body of Christ Blood of Christ transubstantiation

                                                                          religious or solemn ceremony never could tolerate their whiff those who were followers took themselves too seriously 

                                                                      serious sheep could be herded by snarling dogs

 

she walked into the kitchenhe looked up wearing a white ribbed dago-T of his  paleblue tan striped panties 

she yawned grunted as she stretched

                                          smiled fuckin dimples  Man  Coffee smells good, baby.              

he got up from the Sixties yellow linoleum kitchen set he had from his parents took her in his arms hers were still above her head  kissed her gently

                                  Could I pour you a cup

sleepily yet Please.

                      making her way to a chair she looked at the magazine he was reading spineup open on top of scribbled paper a red ink ballpoint pen laid above them

                                                            Whacha reading writing?

he splashed cream into her cup

                                  Ya don wanna knowtoo early Tell you later when we shower

                he loved showering with her

                                                among other things they had swell conversations 

1014,  Sunday,  6  2. 22

Anti-Defamation League (ADL – disliked acronyms)  https://www.adl.org/education/resources/glossary-terms/blood-libel

https://www.myjewishlearning.com/article/who-killed-jesus/

   kick the bucket

                    not unusualuncommon nomenclature cloture  closer cant help himselfhe stuttered as a boy until he gained his confidence  then there was no shutting him up KICKING 

        Yes possibly a devised exit strategy exo-existent stratagem  Buhbye baby byebye KICKING

his father called to tell him he was throwing a ninetyfirst birthday party for himself 

                                                                                        . . . and you’re invited to every birthday after until I kick the bucket.

Ill be there

that afternoon he called his daughter to invite her

                                                     I didnt tell your grandfather but while Im there Im removing every bucket he has in his house

she laughed such a beautiful goodnatured laugh

                                                 Good idea, Dad, make sure you remove that bucket from your house as well.

Mine are put up an away couldnt kick em if I tried

Put away?! Nah, hell no, get rid of that shit.

Its tough to clean without a bucket

DAD . . this is the bucket of death we’re talking about. You can get a cleaning bucket.

And  uh um that said a cleaning bucket couldnt become The Bucket of Death as youve so aptly said

Not in my world.

                  You think kicking the bucket is for any ol’ bucket?!

      Oof . . you gotta hear this, and I quote: The term is known to date from at least the Sixteenth Century. The more interesting, probably apocryphal origin, relates to suicides who would stand on a large bucket with a noose around their neck and, at the moment of their choosing, would kick it away.

Hmm no shit

               Could be my love weve created the next big thing on the market a goodhumoured niche item a big heavy black bucket labeled DEATH

she laughedchortled

                     Look at us, we’re entrepreneurs! We’re going to make millions!

Yesyes beaucoup bucks off buckets

STOP.

Don ya think beaucoup bucks we could be cool edgy ifyad rather boocoo

                                                                               Groovyhuh

Really, Dad, STOP.

Baby whars that entrepreneurial spirit entrepreneural cant help himselfhe stuttered

1141,  Thursday,  27  1. 22

1331,  Saturday,  5  2. 22

the tilesmackdab in the corner of the bathroom had a roundbald alien head peering at him through its right blackblown iris its left eye a stitchedslit a queershaped O snaggletooth mouth frozen in utterance or exclamation

on the tile beneath it was an enormous compared to cueballs dogs head he didnt know what breedwasnt fond of them  at its chin like patientapathetic chewtoy was a comic holloweyed duck skull its bill tip upturned wickedly

and on the tile beneath it was an outline similar to one runround a murder victim providing their attitude at death of a huge turd where someone shat on the floor rather than squat on the pot where he sat noticing the tiles

                                                                                                               sometimes

a bowel movement is unlike clockwork it comes in the time it wishes rather than we want

                                                                                          Mother said Go with it, don’t push, let it happen, you don’t want hemorrhoids.JESUS that didnt sound good HEMORRHOIDS could almost fashion horror from its letters since he was content to wait out a turd it knew better

                                                                 besides  he didnt go in without reading material  would have been right at home in an outdoor privy perhaps where privacy was begat

1143,  ReggaeFriday,  4  2. 22

1111, Saturday,  5  2. 22

All Systems Red Martha Wells  her murderbot hooked him all machines were murderbots to him

                                                                                                            it said to itself why would it talk to a human being unless addressed “I borked my own governor module.”

reading that he saw he had something in common with it

                                                              he realised at a very young age that his life was histhat he wasnt alive to please or satisfy anyone other than himself

he was selfish

but he also realised that if he couldnt pleaselove himself how could he possibly please or love anyone else

he could not 

    so

        he broke with his parents

fortunately they recognised he hardened his stubbornness annealed it

they offered him no consolation

                                told him hed have no one to blame other than himself

Why would I blame someone else for my actions That makes no sense  

he was old for someone young

his parents were strict 

he was accountable

                           a fictitious machine was first to explain to him he borked his parents

310 preferred to 1510,  Day-between-Two-Ts,  2  2. 22

1143,  ReggaeFriday,  4   2. 22

Am I bruskabrupt 

I am

Am I rude

  I am

Am I honest

I am

honesty forgives the nature that covets it

                                           anwhile bitter while upsetting those less inclined

there is no step to take back

                                    not a step to withdraw

do not pull through honesty

                             looking for its fault

that is on who is not

1243 preferred to 0043,  ReggaeFriday,  4  2. 22

1023,  ReggaeFriday,  4  2. 22

Breathe through your nose

                        Breathe  through your nose he kept telling himselfreminding himself

why he did was beyond himwasnt a yoga freak

he did

it worked

planks

pushups

situps

   nose breathing

                    but doing so felt like he was being watchedwatched uncomfortably close  undeniably close

inspected

             introspection

fact of the matter was he broke his nose four times 

                                                      breath wasnt happycontent through his nose  he preferred to gulp airGULP through his mouth like a drowning fish

                                                   GULP like he was gobbling an enormous tit  YEShe was sure it smelled wonderful but smelling cant contend with tasting not tactilely titilatingly as sucking

                                                                                           YES it influences taste Sure  No doubt  hed concede

           rather though hed take it in his mouth than his nose

                                                                  not that hed discountout of hand an erect nipple stuffed in his nostrilhe was game sexually he was game for everything

                                                                 with the opposite sex  

heterosexual 

            he was devoutly heterosexual

when homosexuals hit on him he acknowledged their attractionfavour

                                                                         You flatter meThank you but Im straight

How do you know if you haven’t tried?

Tried  the catchword

                     Maybe  if you had tits maybe if you had an appleshaped ass maybe if you had feminine curves and a pussy 

               No  Not really

Ultimately obviously swinging a cock  Cocks arent appealingmines not   Case closed

Be content with thank you Please So I don have to fuck you up  he didnt say that

    Curiously

                he found he exerted himself better if he breathed through his nose

939 preferred to 2139,  Thursday,  3  2. 22

his eyes probably had more fun with him than others eyes had with them

a doubletake wasnt a oneoff

                             often he found himself shaking his head like a Beatle performing She Loves You did he really see that

       NO when all the evidence was in definitely not 

thats okay

           that it dawned on him tickled himmade him smile made others suspicious Why’s he smilin’? people arent amused when you walk around smiling like youre in possession of something extremely pleasant who are you to have it dont they deserve it they want it too no matter theyre without a clue what it is

                                                                                   I Me Mine

recently he walked to the market reading a scifi by Martha Wells All Systems Red about a murderbot 

he was engrossedthoroughly entertained

crossing lanes of traffic in a crosswalk that had to provide him thirty seconds to cross he did say lanes he entered the shopping complex

                   on the sidewalk running before the shopsto his right the parking lot an enormous scab of tarmac perhaps onehunred coloured vehicles he glimpsed six spaces one after the other at the very front of the lane allotted preference in consideration of the twoyear old Trump virus and its spawn at the head of each space was a sign that read DRIVEL UP & GO

                                   they were pickup spots for grocery customers who called in their orders for no extra fee except that one would likely be more circumspect picking out their produce associates delivered them to the parked cars

he bookmarked and closed the book set it inside the cloth shopping bag hanging from his shoulder and masked up  thereby denying others of his humoured smile and their suspicions DRIVEL UP

                                                                                                                     but ofcourse

1400,  Monday,  24  1. 22

1034,  Thursday,  3  2. 22

Beatles  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S302kF8MJ-I

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=seqaTuXkqFI

annealed truth 

                 as it should beought to be any truth less will be deemedattacked as fraudulent by purveyors of lies and fraud

       they cant have adult Americans between sixteen and seventyfour fiftyfour percent of whom cannot read at a Sixth Grade level know the real truth

sheep 

       Sixth Grade either eleven or twelve years old

at nine tested he readhad a vocabulary equivalent to high school students

he credited his mother who read to him as a boy and his abject fear of not being promotedbeing flunked 

                                                                                                           flunked  plunked like a dull stone in a creek or river fish shit a spit curl on his forehead

abject fear

educators today refuse to fail students they worry about their selfesteem

                                                             FUCK their selfesteem

imagine their selfesteem when they cant read text HOW TO or manuals

imagine their selfesteem when their children come to them for help with schoolwork and they cant 

                                                                                                       what business did they have having children  idiots likely to raise idiots because educators run mills in one door and outNEXT

flunk them

            or theyre fucked

806 preferred to 2006,  Day-between-Two-Ts,  2  2. 22

https://www.forbes.com/sites/michaeltnietzel/2020/09/09/low-literacy-levels-among-us-adults-could-be-costing-the-economy-22-trillion-a-year/?sh=6f82c9f24c90

he grimaced  said Jesus under his breath

                                           Ya might wanna be careful who you call incel man

they were behind a group of five guys three dogs on a hiking trail that was nearing the end they were playing with remotecontrol big wheel trucks ran them around the dirt path and on fallen tree limbs

                                                                                           having a ball

They can’t hear me, I’m not even sure they understand English.

Its likely one or more understand English better than you understand Spanish despite the disjointed smattering you toss around

They can’t hear me.

they came up on the men and dogs quickly

exchanged pleasantries

                             he couldnt restrain himself  Hola 

he said Afternoon gents 

they excused themselves as they passed

some thirty meters up the path

                                 Are you fucking kiddin me Hola

What?

   Never mind never mind

                                  Back to my point as we came up behind them incel involuntarily celibate

I know what it is, I wouldn’t have said so otherwise.

Yes but yare not seeing the whole picture

The whole picture. What whole picture? Five guys walking their dogs playing with remote toys, you don’t think a bunch of guys like that might not be, probably are, in all likelihood, incels?

No  I do not

You’re kidding me.

No

What do you think?

More likely family members  possibly a father his brother their sons enjoying the day hiking walking their dogs enjoying remotecontrol trucks

I think more likely incels.

Dude yare welcome to what you think

                                            However does it occur to you that possibly they look at us an think incel gringos   Because we aint getting laidARE WE

 

heading out of the park they passed two women entering

they exchanged pleasantries

So wha do ya think

Think?

Sure Is there a name for female incels or are they just called incels too

                                                                            The way they looked at us they were thinking we were either incels or    or  homos

JESUS!

           he didnt cotton alternative lifestyles  which made him laugh he thought himself too masculine looking to be mistaken as a homo

        sometimes he did it just to return him to the planet Earth and recognise that assumptions go both ways

WHERE  FAGGOT

little after 1848,  Saturday,  29  1. 22

239 preferred to 1439,  Day-between-Two-Ts,  2  2. 22

Coltrane Quartet  Love Supreme  Pt. III – Pursuance  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aGT7AFCTpzU

Do you remember the Hass'?

Cant say I do

Really? They lived behind you across the alley.

I remember a middleaged couple didnt see much of them though  that hedge grew at the back of our property

You’re kidding me . . you don’t remember Mr. Hass spanking his wife on the backsteps, taking her over his knee and spanking her with his bare hand, calling her naughty, “my very naughty wife.”

at that moment he wished this wasnt a telephone conversation 

                                                                 His naughty wife

Yes.

     They were muscular cracks on the ass.   I saw.

An I have no doubt I believe you

                                  He spank her for something she did wrong

Yes, like we’d get spanked as children, laid across a knee.

I got spanked bare ass standing up Got to choose which of my fathers belt hed use  Met a guy out here Walker Walker   know this  ahJerry  Jerry had to go out into his backyard an pick the switch his old man would use on him

By the bye also German

Yare German

I am.

he was still wishing this wasnt over the phone  he was already missing her expressionthe expression on her face he wouldnt see 

Did it occur to youobviously not then though perhaps now  Mr Hass wasnt punishing his wife

Wasn’t?

No

He spanked her, spanked her on the steps, out in the open.

When he let go of her did she immediately go into the house

She did.

Did Mr Hass immediately follow

He did.

he wish he wasnt on the phone

                                  It occurs to mewould have occurred then had I seen it  I thinkI believe rather you witnessed their foreplay

                                      Foreplay?

Yes

Yathink? 

he was missing it  really wished they were face to face

                                                           Yes  Definitely

Hass is a name that was selected from vocabulary words by government officials when surnames became compulsory Its from hadu h a d u which meant battle or strife The German nickname for a bitter or vicious man Middle High German was haz h a z wondering if hazing came from it Ill have to see be that as it may haz meant hatred Crazy background to ones name

              Any idea what your surname might mean Supposedly mine was given to makers of curved wood staves that were fashionedbound for barrels

 

 

her surname was a medieval given name that meant "the descendant of little Bilo" when extrapolated was bil which meant sword  apparently two edges

little after 1540,  Saturday,  29  1. 22

1124,  Day-between-Two-Ts,  2  2. 22