22.5.15








Hermann headrusHESSE and those sscissors
 
they badgered him long after he committed them to the pages he needed

first as longhand  thatched   in some instances inked shabbily  palimpsest
scribbled and reworked over and over so that he had to use a magnifying glass on to see where he was going to come down with them

                            what he decyphered may
or may not have been written

or have even existed

more than a few times they were best guesses
tapped  assuming their context in regards to the rest of the sentence or piece

if it made any sense
                                  because continuity wasnt his strong suit

I think . . . therefore I am . . . therefore I lack continuity




                                                                                                                                                 the sscissors were at work
though not that he could see
they were what he could hear   the shiver of the paper photograph or canvas being cut 

and what was being cut was headrusHESSE 

a reticular profile
portraiture
                              running   sliver   by   sliver   away from itself



                                                                                                                                                  we ignore profiles to-day
impinged by the convenience of thoughtlessly selfies
unabashed  blatant  mimicries(authentically inauthentic) of who we think we are 

and yet cant seem to help ourselves
 

profiles were once elegantly practised   and purchased                          

people dressed immaculately for them   

sat    

those profiles held intrinsic attributes

they were extensions of their personalities 
artful representation


he might be mistaken but hed lay heavy coin on it

he believed photographic portraitures and death masks were commensurately in vogue

though  likely  it seemed to him death masks gave way to mimical photographs

he couldnt help but imagine however  the fulfilling gravitas to be able to stand at arms length from ones self
and with keen introspection   admire   perhaps   what their death masks might suggest  or hold



Yes                                                                               
apparently we are our technology

Native American Indians believed photographs would rob them of their souls
what  likely  have selfies obliterated or depleted 
have they erased the semiotic representations any individual might have held 

when the images are nothing more than vessels  common products  as aluminum cans stacked on grocery shelves

then emptied  and scattered flattened or crushed for refuse piles  or tossed on urban streets and alleyways
littering the dirt sides of county roads

---   he digresses   ---


the stoic profile inspiring him was Hermann Hesses(headrusHESSE)

it was only one of scores that he had seen                      

it obviously pushed it way into his unconsciousness(consciously there
wasnt a good reason it would keep to his mind)                   

it appeared to either rise up out of the cold deep  placidly breaking the surf  or like a rendered bust of stone strenuously revealed   wrought to existence by the iron  hammer blows  and art of a sculptor


an dynamic uncommon presence                                                                                                       

making itself more rare as it began to reticulate to Hermanns left  his right
fanning out across his vision
thin cut like Polish folk art

the slivers moving off   
                                   and separate

behind them   something turbulent was trying to reveal itself
held or retained
as if behind glass

                                                                                                          and before he could make out what the spasm was
the slivers  still orbiting away  evenly spaced  began to swell in either direction

linear cells reproducing in the image and profile of which they were begotten                              

until the original image was multiplied and spanned what his eyes could hold                           

like the backs of multiple decks of playing cards

as if expertly spread across the green felt of a 21 table in Reno


Then
        they are suddenly restacked under the original profile
it nearer to him 
                         and as suddenly  spasmodically   the sshivering sound again of sscissors cutting
the sslivers  again  manifesting themselves


across his eyes




1913,  Monday,  18  5. 15
1516,  Friday,  22  5. 15

21.5.15



she dropped an innarestin quotient in his corduroyed lap
 
accidentally  :  incidentally
                                                                                        you know how accidents happen
you take your eye off the ball  it smashes you between the eyes  bloodies your nose
gets a cold beefsteak laid on your face to stop it from swelling more than it has
That dont look so bad(lying through their teeth  --  better you than them)


--   Im sorry
he asked  incredulous
Again
he couldnt be sure  he heard his ears right
they no more trustworthy than his eyes 

she gulped slightly(maybe nauseated)  aware its  weight  might be more than he was prepared to bear

but it occurred to her
and if it occurred to her he was going to hear of it
like it or not
not really her problem
                                    and hed come around to that  quicker than most people
it wouldnt matter to him
not relationships 
                            not family  friends  strangers
to him
they were people

nothing more than people


--   What I said was  What if these kids are authentically inauthentic
                                                                  
--   Okay
Then I heard myself and you
right



Authentically   inauthentic


Quite the charge
and by your tone  any excuse would be a shit excuse 

--   Cant you hear them rolling out the ignorance  I didnt know any better I wasnt taught any better

How old does one have to be
I mean  really
                                
If theyre in college theyre old enough 
 
--   Yea
Theyre meat 

--   Well  cutting to the quick
Not pretty

Yes 

Meat

--   Ooh
So theres no jury out on this

--   No
Seated 
Unanimous

--   You gather  understand  your   he shook his head   quotient  concept  is radical
Not one wed want to have legs

she nodded

Authentically inauthentic

she nodded



Fuck

--   You said it
--   No                               
You said it

Im reacting 

 --   Yes
I did

--   Were in a twist  because authenticity carries weight for you and me

It doesnt have to  not for others

Their prerogative 

You agree

HAActually   Agreeing or disagreeing is worthless

--   You dont want to sugarcoat it 

just a little bit   

--   Are you fuckin kiddin me
Any sugar in authentically inauthentic



--   It was a little abrupt
--   A little


I thought understatement was my forte

--   Didnt mean to step on your toes

--   Stomp
more accurate

Honest to gawd


I cant say it would have ever occurred to me 

--   Well  thatll teach you to talk about urban influences and big money on small cities 

--   Couldnt spare me
--   I didnt spare myself

--   No  You did not
And now what

--   I wanted to hear what you thought while I worked on what I thought

--   Jaysus

Authentically inauthentic


Sounds cyborg
Symply disgusting

--   Symply  Threw a y in there didnt you

--   Y knot

--   And knot with a k

--   I dont know that you wanna crawl around inside my head  No telling the shit you might come away with
And the stains  they dont wash out

--   And hence why I disgorged the concept                                                                         
Your quotient

--   It aint no millipede baby  a jawed venomous centipede 

--   Insects

--   Legs  Dont want it gaining legs


Jaysus
The things you think
--   I think 

As if you ought to talk 

--   I cant say the things I think are particularly speculative

This is a whole new ball of wax


Social media
building a hive



Human hive mentality


--   I wasnt thinking that when I thought it

--   And now

--   Im thinking it



--   Better conceive of a smoker to disperse the critters at a technological level  eSmok




morning coffee,  Friday,  15 5. 15
1427,  Sunday,  17  5. 15